11 Reasons Your Boyfriend is not Committing

Do you think you have found your life partner, soulmate, but he does not seem to be taking the relationship to the next level. This is a big step that takes lots of thinking and understanding between two people. Many men feel hesitant in taking the next big step and getting into a committed relationship.

There may be a lot of reasons for the same. You might be at your best but there may be something else that is going on in his mind right now. Waiting for the moment when your partner will come up with the question “Will you Marry Me?” can be trying at times.

Following are the real reasons your boyfriend may not be committing and how you can try to get out of these situations and mend things between the two of you.

1. He Still has Feelings for his Ex: If your boyfriend is not committing to you, then maybe he still is not over with his ex. He still has feelings that he is not aware of himself. It is better to talk out any issues with him rather than trying to fish out old pictures and old memories with his ex. This may infuriate him further as this needs to be tackled carefully.

It is important to know whether was he dumped or he was the dumpee. If it is the first case, then needs time to get over it so you need to give him some space and let time take its course. If he was a dumpee, you need to be careful about your relationship and should know the reason why he did it.

2. You are not the only one: The reason your boyfriend is not committing to you is that he may be seeing other girls. If you are not able to spend evenings with him, he is always late from office and parties, never introduces you to his friends.

Always keeps his phone to himself and does not get romantically involved with you; then he just seems to be interested in keeping more options to himself. You need to be straightforward in asking him about it, or the other girl may become his future committed relationship.  

Other hints that he may be dropping at you that tell that you are not the only one in his life are:

• Does not like to commit on any future plans involving you
• He is as mysterious as the first day you met him because as relationship proceeds, every person opens up.
• Lots of female friends
• You are just a friend in everyone’s eyes
• There is lack of intimacy in your relationship
• You rarely get to see him in spite of putting all the efforts to be together and spend quality time
• Flirty nature of your boyfriend may hint at infidelity from his side
• He does not tell you who is he meeting even after inquiring

3. He is not falling for you: Your boyfriend may be a casanova type of a person, who falls for every woman he meets, but it only lasts for a few days. Then there is a possibility that you are also one of those girls he fell for. You are dealing with a typical romance-junkie. To resolve this, you need to provide more than just physical intimacy or emotional support. You need to find the areas where you can touch his soul and get close to him.

4. Money Matters: If money is the only thing on his mind, then he may not want to enter into a committed relationship because he wants to focus on his career right now before he plunges to say “Marry Me”. Money is an important part of our lives and as much as we may say, it really does matter.

Disagreement on money related matters can ruin even the strongest of relationships. In order to get him into confidence, you need to support him with his ambitions and look forward to helping him financially instead of being a burden on him.

One person should not be responsible for earning and it should be a joint effort by both of you.

5. Not ready to take the Responsibility: Being responsible for someone else is a big step. Commitment brings you together with your boyfriend for every decision in the future, which he may not be ready for. A great way to deal with this problem is to talk to him, tell him that you are an independent individual who can take care of herself. You will be a supporting factor instead of being a burden.

6. He is not that into you: Being together and in a relationship does not mean that it will always end up in commitment and marriage. There is a possibility that he is with you just for the sake of being in a relationship and will probably move on when he finds someone else.

Then you will be dumped. This does not mean that he is insensitive and does not know anything about love. It is just that he knows that you are not the one for him.

7. He is feeling Burdened: It is a possibility that even if you are ready to take the next step, he may not be ready for it. And bugging him time and again and trying to talk him to get into a commitment will make him feel burdened. Even if he wants the same, this constant nagging drifts his away from you. The best thing you can do in such cases is to let him be free, and you will see that he will come right back to you.

8. He had bad past experiences: When a person goes through a troubled relationship and breakup, it leaves a scar on their personality. They need time to become what they were. If your boyfriend has come out of a similar situation of a troubled relationship, he still may have scars from it and this is what is keeping him from taking the next step with you. It is best to give him some space and be very patient and things will change with time.

9. You are being overprotective: Another reason that your boyfriend is not ready to go to the next level with you is actually because of your overprotective nature. Being too concerned with what he is doing every time, calling him up again and again does take a toll on your relationship.

If this is the case, then it is time to let loose and give some freedom to your boyfriend and you will be able to see the changes. It is important to discuss your fears, insecurities, hopes and dreams with your boyfriend as these conversations make your relationship stronger.

It is important to have a healthy relationship than an overprotected one.

10. Trust Issues: You not trusting your boyfriend or vice versa can be a very compelling reason for your boyfriend not taking a step further in your relationship and committing. Trusting your partner is the base of a strong and healthy relationship. If there is nothing that should affect the trust in your relationship, then you should talk to him. Resolve any misunderstandings as they can have a really bad effect on your relationship.

11. Monotonous Relationship: He feels that this relationship is okay but not great can be another reason for him not taking the big step. Monotony steps in when the relationship moves with time. The reasons for fading chemistry between you and your boyfriend could be

• Lack of honesty
• You do not spend quality time together
• Your relationship has stopped growing
• Lack of physical intimacy

Working on the above reasons can help remove monotony from your relationship and make things better between the two of you.

Conclusion:

All the relationships need efforts from both sides. Relationships that are one sided do not last. Giving commitment is a promise for life and voluntary. You can give up only you are having a sense of feeling that the person you like is not willing to move to the next step. If things are not improving with your efforts and time; then maybe it is time to take some actions. You need to move on and look for better things in life.