Do you feel that getting a divorce was a mistake and that you want to get your ex-wife back after divorce? Worried that this may be a mistake, but can’t shake the feeling that you two are meant to be together?

Don’t worry! You are not alone.

A lot of divorced couples decide to get back together months or even years after getting divorced. After all, there is so much history there that it is difficult to let go of a relationship like that.

Many people fail to keep the relationship strong after a few years of marriage and simply drift apart. And, later, they realize that they made a mistake and want to reconcile with their ex-spouses.

If you are in a similar situation, then there definitely is a way for you to get your ex-wife back after divorce. You can get back together and start fresh, just like so many other couples have done.

But, how do you get your ex-wife back after divorce?

That’s what I am here to help you with. In this post, I will tell you exactly how to get your ex-wife back after divorce in six easy steps.

Follow these steps on how to get your ex-wife back after divorce and rebuild your relationship with the woman of your dreams.

Ready to get started?

Here are the six steps to get your ex-wife back after divorce.

Step 1: Understand Why Your Marriage Failed

The first thing that you need to do when you start thinking about getting your ex-wife back after divorce, is to think about what went wrong the first time and why your marriage failed.

This will help you get more clarity on the core issues in your marriage that led to the divorce. You have to be very honest with yourself and accept responsibility if it was your fault. And, if it wasn’t, then you have to be willing to forgive and get past it before you even try to get your ex-wife back after divorce.

There can be many reasons for your divorce, but I have categorized them under a few categories. See which of these you can relate to and then proceed accordingly.

Ready to find out what they are?

Here you go.

Infidelity

Sadly, this is one of the most common reasons why couples seek divorce and it is also one of the toughest to get over. If either you or your partner cheated, then it is going to be tough for both of you.

If you are the one who cheated, then you will need a lot of time to convince your ex-wife that it was a mistake and that you have changed. You can get your ex back after cheating, but you have to do your best and follow the rules. The key thing, in this case, is to win her trust back and you will have to work extra hard for that.

In case your wife was the one who cheated, you need to ask yourself if you really are ready to move past that and give her another chance. Before you learn how to get your ex-wife back after divorce, be sure that you really want to get her back.

Getting over something like that is not easy and takes time. So, give yourself that time to think and process things, before you try to get your ex-wife back, simply driven by emotions.

Incompatibility

A lot of marriages fail simply because the partners have conflicting personalities and are not willing to accept or respect each other, despite their differences. If your marriage ended because of such differences that could have been resolved by communication, then there’s still hope for you.

If you think there is still a strong bond between you and your ex-wife, then the chances of getting her back are high. Issues can always be resolved, as long as you both are willing to work on them and give your marriage another try.

If you fall into this category, then make a list of all the issues that led you two to seek divorce. Ask yourself if you are ready to work on them and if they can be resolved.

It is also a good idea to think of a few things that you two can try to work out your differences on before you approach her. Do your part and then learn how to get your ex-wife back after divorce by reading the rest of this post.

Loss of Affection

This is another common reason why married couples seek divorce. Sometimes, through no one’s fault, people just drift apart.

Sometimes, the romance just dies after some time as you get busy with your daily lives and forget to take time out for each other. At other times, you get too comfortable and complacent in the relationship, to the extent that it becomes monotonous.

Whatever the reason, if your marriage ended because there was no romance left, you may be able to make it work by starting fresh. There are ways for you to rekindle that fire that you first felt in the initial stages of your marriage.

However, it is important for you to find out if your ex still loves you, because if she doesn’t, then it will be harder for you to get her back.

Other Reasons

There are many other reasons why people get divorced, but the important thing is to understand if it is worth it for you to try again. If the reason for divorce is so strong that either one of you can’t get past it, then it will be very hard to start fresh.

Spend some time thinking about why you and your ex-wife sought a divorce and if you could really try again.

Also, think about the reasons why you want to get your ex-wife back after divorce.

Want to learn what some of those reasons could be?

Find out in the next section.

Step 2: Think About Why You Want to Get Your Ex-Wife Back

Think About Why You Want to Get Your Ex-Wife Back
Image via Pexels

Once you have gained some clarity on why your marriage ended, you will be in a better position to assess why you want to get your ex-wife back.

A lot of times, we find it difficult to accept something as devastating as a divorce and get too emotional to think clearly. You may be facing a similar situation where your emotions are crowding your judgment.

It’s important to think about and find a strong reason to get your ex-wife back after divorce.

Here are some good reasons for you to get your ex-wife back after divorce. See if you can relate to any of these.

  • You have kids together and you want to provide a stable family for them.
  • You have a lot of history together and, in hindsight, you feel that there was more good than bad in your marriage.
  • You have both changed and have started to see each other in a different light, thinking this might be the right time to start fresh.
  • The love is still there and you want to give it another chance by communicating better this time.
  • You feel that you rushed things by getting a divorce and that your problems could easily have been resolved.
  • You were not ready for it then, but have grown up since and are finally ready to fully commit to it.

The list is endless and these are just some examples. The thing to remember is that you both should be ready to make it work this time.

However, if you had very strong reasons to get divorced, reasons that are still present, then getting back together with your ex-wife might not be the best option. So, think about it and then decide.

In the end, the decision to get your ex-wife back is entirely yours and I can’t make that decision for you. Think about it and be sure before you move on to the next step.

Ready to find out what the next step is?

Keep reading.

Step 3: Take Some Time to Work on Yourself

Even after you have made the decision to get your ex-wife back after divorce, don’t jump right in. You need to give yourself some time to think things through and to prepare for it before you try to win her back.

This is especially important when the reason why you got divorced was because of something that you did. In this case, you need to work on yourself and improve upon the things that led to your divorce.

Even if the divorce was not just your fault, at least work on things that you know she would appreciate in the “new you”. Start taking better care of yourself, work out, invest time in your hobbies, go out with friends, etc.

You will get extra points for posting about these on social media so that your ex-wife can see the transformation for herself. Once you feel that you are ready to get back in touch and try to get your ex-wife back, move on to the next step.

You never know, maybe your ex misses you and wants you back, and these will just give her a slight nudge to act on it.

Step 4: Reinitiate Contact Slowly

Reinitiate Contact Slowly
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This is the stage where you finally initiate contact with your ex-wife, after a considerable period of no contact. By this time, you have utilized this no-contact period to think about what went wrong, why you want her back, and on improving yourself.

Now, it is time to actually start working on your plan to get your ex-wife back after divorce.

First, initiate a conversation over text. A simple “Hi! How are you?” is enough to slowly get back in touch in a friendly way.

Many of you may already be in touch with your ex-wife because of your children or for other formalities after divorce. Even then, you have probably limited your conversation to just the work at hand, rather than having a friendly banter.

In either case, start texting her and gauge her response to your texts. If it is friendly, (which it likely will be if you ended things on a friendly note), then you are already off to a good start.

If she is still angry with you or resentful, then maybe it’s because you did something wrong. In this case, begin by apologizing for whatever you did to hurt her and genuinely ask for forgiveness.

When she sees that you are genuinely sorry for everything and are a changed person, she may slowly let go of her pent up anger and resentment.

Once you are back on friendly terms, that’s when you finally make your move and start to work on rekindling the romance.

Want to find out how?

Keep reading to learn how to proceed after you’re back on talking terms with your ex-wife.

Step 5: Start Dating Again

Once you are back on friendly terms with your ex-wife, it is time to move ahead and start dating again.

You will have to judge when it is the right time to ask her out. Maybe you can simply ask to have dinner with her sometime. You could ask her to go for a drink after work.

The important thing is to keep it simple and friendly, and not make a big deal out of it.

Another important part of getting back with your ex-wife after divorce is to start fresh. This means that you should not try to pick up where you left off.

You have to start again from the beginning. This means asking her out, going on dates, and having fun as you used to at the beginning of your relationship.

Basically, start your new relationship like two strangers rather than ex-spouses. And, do not bring up old grievances, because that would do no good.

Also, it is a good idea to put off sleeping together for as long as possible. The reason is that it is very easy after that to feel like that you guys still have the love and intimacy that you used to.

Instead, just focus on having fun together and doing things that you didn’t or couldn’t do when you were married. Also, don’t keep your children or friends as a buffer, just spend time with each other.

In fact, inform your friends only when you both feel comfortable making things official. You can keep things quiet in the beginning if that takes the pressure off.

Step 6: Win Her Back

Win Her Back
Image via Pexels

If you want to get your ex-wife back after divorce, then this time that you spend together while dating is crucial. During this time, you need to win her trust back and show her that you are a changed man.

I would not advise you to go overboard and set unrealistic expectations that you can’t match later. Instead, make small, positive changes in your behavior that you can maintain in the long term.

Focus especially on the things about you that she did not like and show her real, noticeable changes there. Basically, utilize this time together, not just to have fun and rekindle the romance, but to also show her that you have improved a lot since you got divorced.

What Next?

Now that you have learned how to get your ex-wife back after divorce, it’s time to implement these tips. So, get started on your quest to get your ex-wife back after divorce and share your experience with me.

These six steps are broadly categorized to include all possible scenarios and apply to almost everyone who is seeking to get their ex-wife back after divorce. Leverage these to get your ex-wife back and don’t waste your second chance.

For a more detailed guide on this topic, check out our ebooks on “How to Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back” and “How to Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back.” These are the ultimate resources on this subject and can help you get your ex-wife back for sure.

Have any further questions or simply want to share your story? Feel free to leave a comment.

Reunite With Your Ex-Partner

This 14-day relationship program will help you learn how to take responsibility for your relationship, repair your mistakes, and build a stronger and happier relationship with your ex. 

You’ll learn how to communicate effectively, set boundaries, and resolve conflict in a healthy manner. By the end of this program, you’ll have the necessary tools you need to get your ex back and build a strong, lasting relationship.

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