Did you know that love is one of the basic human needs?
It is, and it’s one of the biggest reasons why you should never give up on love.
According to Maslow, love is one of the basic needs one must meet before getting self-actualized.
Love is, therefore, a necessity.
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But the problem is navigating love isn’t easy. There are multiple ups and downs in any relationship.
So, how do you keep your love intact?
You need to fight for your love and hold onto it. When relationships get very hard, it seems that the only way to be happy is to leave.
But that may not be the best idea.
Heartbreaks can also make you give up on love. You spend years or months with someone you thought was the one, only for the relationship to end. It then looks like you can never find someone to love you as they did.
But you should never give up on love.
You should never give up trying.
Why?
Let me list out all the reasons for you.
Evolving Perspective: Don’t Give Up On Love Ever!
At some point in life, you may have concluded that love hurts. Well, that’s because betrayal, dishonesty, infidelity creep up in relationships.
In other cases, you may love someone who doesn’t reciprocate the feelings, and that may cause you pain. It hurts to get your heart broken; it also hurts when a relationship you’ve worked so hard on fails.
Sure, love is hard.
Relationships may not work for a variety of reasons, but that doesn’t mean you give up on love.
To put things into perspective, let’s take a look at some of the reasons why you shouldn’t give up on love.
1. Nothing Is Easy, Including Love
Love needs work, just like everything else in life does.
You put up with issues you never thought you could, make sacrifices, compromise, accept changes, and move forward.
You don’t just leave during tough times or when things get uncomfortable.
What if you aren’t talking to your partner? Don’t get discouraged.
It’s important to understand that every relationship goes through anger, drama, suffering, fears, and fights. However, it’s how you deal with your issues that make all the difference.
Sticking together and bravely weathering the storms can make your love stronger. But if you can’t do that, then you are better off not getting into a relationship in the first place.
When you love someone with all your heart, you don’t give up whenever you encounter uncertainties.
A simple disagreement should not make you give up on love.
2. Broken Hearts Heal, Eventually
Heartbreaks should never be the reason you give up on love. It’s easy to think you will never find true love when going through a heartbreak. That’s because you are going through a rough time.
But you’ll get through it.
Your broken heart will eventually heal, and that person you’re grieving will ultimately become a distant memory.
And the best part?
They teach you so much about what love is and what it isn’t. They make you wiser so that you know what to avoid in future relationships when you get back out there.
You need to realize that each relationship you get into teaches you something. It may not give you all you ever wanted, but it helps you understand what you don’t want.
3. You Deserve Real Love
It’s easy to give up on love after disappointments, but as pointed above, human beings are wired to find love. It’s human nature to find comfort and companionship in others.
We pursue it in our quest for friends, family, and loved ones. We look for it because it lifts our spirits and makes us the best version of ourselves.
So, never give up on love.
At some point, the man or woman you’ve always dreamt of will come your way.
4. You Need To Love Yourself
Do you love yourself?
Learning how to love and accept yourself isn’t easy.
But self-love is very important.
Why is this?
It affects most of the other decisions you make in life — how you relate to others, how you perform your work, how you spend your free time, and more.
Most people dwell on their insecurities instead of focusing on the aspects they love about themselves. Others don’t know how to be alone or don’t think they can make it independently.
That’s where self-love comes into play.
It gives you self-worth and self-confidence. Self-love fills you with positivity and makes it easy to fall in love with someone else.
Self-love teaches you how to take care of yourself and be happy. It increases your ability to receive and give love.
5. You Need to Be Patient With Yourself
Did you just get off a relationship?
Give yourself time to heal.
Be patient.
Most people give up on love because they move from one relationship to another before healing. Before you move on to another relationship, take time off for yourself, and determine why the relationship didn’t work.
Embrace the pain and conquer it.
Don’t force yourself to move on when you are not ready for it yet. Instead, give yourself room to breathe and get a clear perspective on you, your relationships, emotions, expectations, and deal-breakers.
Healing allows you to learn about yourself. You get to know what you truly want in a relationship so that you know better when getting into another relationship.
6. Don’t Let Your Past Dictate Your Future
Never give up on love because of a bad relationship you had in the past.
Old wounds have a way of ruining good relationships. They can also prevent you from starting a good relationship.
You find yourself wondering:
Should I let go of the protective armor I’ve built after that lousy relationship and risk getting hurt? What if I hold on too tight to the armor and never find true love?
It is like an invisible wall that you build around yourself to prevent other people from hurting you. It’s a good thing.
But if you hold on too tight to it, you may never have the courage to connect, give love, or feel loved again.
Know that you can get past the hurt and find true love. However, you will require a willingness to become vulnerable to love, experiment, and self-reflect.
What can you do?
- Learn to love yourself
- Feel your feelings. Do not push them down since doing this can cause more damage
- Avoid self-talk that sounds like victim talk, self-pity, anger, or defensiveness
- Embrace your vulnerabilities, and slowly open up to those you love. Don’t cover vulnerabilities with pretense, denial, or anger
- Learn to forgive
- Let go of ‘perfection’. You do not have to be right all the time in the relationship
- Speak openly without blaming, judging, attacking meanly, or criticizing
Your wounds should never be the reason you give up on love.
Instead, use them as proof of resilience, courage, and strength. Discover what they are, so that they do not crash you when you are ready to love.
7. Re-evaluate Your Definition of Love
Are you fixated on the idea of finding your soulmate or someone who completely understands you? You may have already fantasized about what their hobbies are or what job they might have.
Stop.
Sometimes we are so fixated on what the one should look like, that we don’t see what’s right in front of us. We get so lost in the definition that we end up giving up on love.
Why is this wrong?
There is no guarantee that there is only one person for you. You can have healthy relationships with different kinds of people in various ways.
This fixation is also one of the reasons most people give up on love. They miss out on opportunities for love as they wait for their soulmates to show up.
That’s pointless.
Do not let the wait for a soulmate be the reason you give up on love. Instead, open yourself up to love from various kinds of people.
Furthermore, you will find that the best relationships are not about finding the right one but finding one ready to make it work together.
8. Do Not Let Fear Prevent You From Finding True Love
You should never give up on love due to fear.
Falling in love is sweet, but it’s also scary. It’s hard to completely trust someone with your heart, especially if you’ve been hurt before.
Most people also give up on love because they are afraid of being in love. These fears may manifest in various ways, but they hold on to them with the hopes that they protect them from getting hurt.
Sadly, they don’t.
They just become illusions you hold on to that keep you from finding true love.
Some common fears include:
- The fear of becoming vulnerable. Falling in love means placing a significant amount of trust in another person.
- The fear of opening up especially if you got hurt in the past
- Fear that you are not worthy of love and don’t deserve happiness
- Fear of the sadness love would stir up, especially in the case of true love
- Fear of hurting the other person, especially if they love you too much
- Fear of losing the person you love
So, how do you overcome these fears?
Recognize that you have them so that you can empower yourself to change.
You should also try to shut down your inner critic.
You know, the one that tells you “you don’t measure up”, “they don’t really love you”, “they will eventually hurt you”, “they are just manipulating you”, “letting them know the real you will hurt even more”, etc.
Listening to your inner critic kills your self-confidence.
You need to identify your fear and view it objectively. When you do that, you’ll stop seeing it as your reality. You will realize that it’s only a matter of perception.
Note: The best way to love someone wholeheartedly, is to make peace with the possibility that love might hurt. Love fully when the chance comes, and trust that you will recover from any hurt that ensues.
9. Expand Your Horizons
Dating is tough.
I know online dating makes it easier to find people, but it can burn you out or ruin your self-confidence.
However, it should never make you give up on love.
Instead, be open to new dating scenes. Go for events, try blind dates, or visit unfamiliar locations. Try out new activities, and you never know, you may develop a crush on someone unexpected in a totally new place.
Open Your Heart to Love. Don’t Give up on Love.
Never give up on love due to your past or fear. You deserve real love, and though you may be hurting right now, you will heal and find someone to love you the way you always wanted.
Sometimes relationships end, but it doesn’t mean you should give up on love. Instead, work on becoming a better version of yourself, expand your horizons, and let your heart be open to love.
I know it can be hard to find the one for you, and you may want to give up. Too much pain can make one break, but don’t let it. Pick yourself up, learn from the past, and give love another chance.
All the best!
What’s stopping you from believing in love? Let me know in the comments section, below. I’ll be happy to help you out!
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